Tiger-Gate Day 4
Day four of Tiger-Gate calls for some humor. Maybe we all are taking this accident a little too seriously. Since Tiger has hired a big time lawyer to handle this mess, we probably will never hear from Tiger on this subject. We certainly can speculate on what Tiger might have told the police if he had ever agreed to talk to them. Here are what might have been Tiger’s Top Ten Statements to the Florida Highway Patrol.
10. Do you guys want some Orlando Magic tickets? Courtside?
9. Hey….I was just crusin for chicks!
8. Did you hear Nike’s new slogan…”Just Crash It”
7. Anybody see my nine iron?
6. Elin’s lessons with Hank Haney have really paid off.
5. Man….I wish I hadn’t lost that deal with General Motors. I need some new wheels.
4. I can’t wait to move out of this neighborhood…the streets aren’t safe anymore.
3. Everyone knows I’m not the greatest driver.
2. It was just like Bay Hill…first I had trouble with a water hazard then I hit a tree.
1. I’d like to make a donation to the “Fire Hydrant Awareness Foundation.”